The first step in earning a foster child’s trust is providing a calm, predictable environment. Foster children coming from uncertain circumstances often feel overwhelmed by change. Keeping routines consistent and offering gentle reassurances throughout the day helps them feel secure and more willing to open up over time.
- Practice Patience and Active Listening
Trust is built through actions, not just words. Listen without interrupting, validate their feelings, and allow space for silence if needed. Many foster children have experienced trauma or inconsistent care and support. Showing that you’re available without pushing for conversation communicates that they can set the pace of the relationship. - Be Honest and Reliable
Always follow through on what you say. If you promise to attend a school event or cook their favorite dinner, keep your word. If something changes, explain it clearly and with empathy. - Respect Their Story
Foster children may not want to share everything at once—or at all. Respect their past without pushing for details. Make it clear that their experiences are valid, and that your role is to support—not to fix or judge. Let them know that trust isn’t a requirement, but something you’re open to building over time. - Encourage Small Choices
Allowing children to make age-appropriate decisions—like picking dinner or choosing a bedtime story—can foster a sense of control and self-esteem. These small choices reinforce the idea that their opinions matter, helping to strengthen the connection between you both. - Offer Unconditional Support
Children in foster care may test boundaries as a way to see if you’ll stay. Respond with understanding and set clear, loving limits. Remind them that your care is not based on behavior but rooted in commitment and stability.
Contact Benison’s today to learn how we support new foster parents every step of the way.
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